Posted (Tina) in All Posts on March-29-2009

Yesterday (Saturday) was great with Ella. She was happy and feeling good. We were having the itch to go out…out with the Bun. We’re not really supposed to since it can expose Ella and even the slightest cold or virus can make her very sick. But, we have been sequestered so much over the past 20 months, we just decided that we wanted to take the risk. So, we went to our favorite breakfast place. Thankfully, there were hardly any children and no one in the vicinity sounded sick. That was a relief.

Ella had a great time just sitting on my lap and people watching. Here and there, she would kick her legs and smile. But for the most part, she was content with her frog and binky just snuggling with Mom. I ate with one hand and enjoyed the pancakes with fresh strawberries and whipped cream. Yum! It just felt good to go out as a family. Before the meal ended, our server came to our table to inform us that an anonymous person had paid for our meal. We were stunned. Apparently, this man told the server that he feels blessed and likes to pay for someone else’s meal each time he goes out to a restaurant. So he asked her to point out her tables. And there you have it…it was such a nice surprise and definitely not expected.

Then as we were about to get up from our table and leave, three ladies came up and asked about Ella. They wanted to know more about her condition, why she was on oxygen and more importantly, they wanted to pray for us and for healing on Ella’s body. Wow. So here we were in the middle of our favorite breakfast place, being blessed by three other believers that felt prompted to pray for our family.

It’s been a rough time lately…emotionally. Sometimes walking through the valley can get the best of you and even though you know the truth about God always being in control and always being with you, it’s easy not to “feel” it. We were discussing that just before breakfast and then both of these events happened. We just felt it was God’s way of letting us know in a tangible way that He is still there. He knows our struggles with Ella and He has a plan.

Finally, we had our date night. We have not been part of a church since we moved back home. Mostly because we cannot take Ella to church with us. But I felt prompted to look for churches that offer Saturday night services. We found one online and just decided to try it. The message was poignant and hit both if us, but especially me. Yes, I was crying throughout the service. Again, we know the truth but it is refreshing to hear it. It was like drinking water from a spring after walking in the desert for months. We’re not sure if we are called to continue attending this particular church, but really enjoyed the service and I could see us attending again. Just an amazing day of feeling God’s hand in our life and Him making it abundantly clear that He has not gone anywhere and He is going to see us through even the toughest of times.

Unfortunately, Ella did not sleep well last night. Josh tried to give me a night of rest, but it was so much, that we ended up both taking turns. Ella woke up several times and then was just awake, wide awake from 2:30am – 5am. What? We tried everything to get her to be tired, but she was wired. It was weird.

Along with a rough night, we have noticed that Ella’s numbers are intermittent. It does seem like her oxygen requirements have creeped up slightly during the day and at night over the past 5 weeks. Not a tremendous amount, but the difference is there. Also, we did decrease the Captopril and then discontinue the medicine about 5 days ago. We’re not sure what impact that is having on her body. But her heart rate seems to be higher at times too. This is a bit of uncharted territory for us. We’ve seen all these signs before and even seen them worse in Ella, but not quite with this exact presentation. So, we’re trying to stay in tune to what might be going on with her. We’re hoping that she sleeps tonight.

And as we retire for the evening, we’re reminded that we are called to trust Him.

Trust in the Lord
The wind’s not always at our back,
The sky is not always blue.
Sometimes we crave the things we lack,
And don’t know what to do.

Sometimes life’s an uphill ride,
With mountains we must climb.
At times the river’s deep and wide,
And crossing takes some time.

No one said that life is easy,
There are no guarantees.
So Trust in the Lord continually,
On calm or stormy seas.

The challenges we face today,
Prepares us for tomorrow.
For faith takes our fears away,
And peace replaces sorrow.